Catch-22

I first read Catch-22 by Joseph Heller when I was in high school, during one of the summers I worked for Great-Grandma Sisi in Manhattan. It is one of the few truly laugh-out-loud funny books I've read. Every weekday riding the Long Island Railroad into New York City, I devoured Catch-22, catching many odd looks from my fellow passengers as I guffawed, often practically to the point of tears.

By the time I read Catch-22, Heller had written two other books: Something Happened (1974) and Good as Gold (1979). Having enjoyed Catch-22 so much, I read them both, and enjoyed neither of them. I tried again in 1984, when Heller published God Knows, with the same result. I finally gave up, deciding that there are some authors and other artists who only have one really great work in them, and they should know when to quit while they're ahead, like Harper Lee, who published To Kill a Mockingbird in 1960 and no other books until her death 56 years later.*

We had our first Bob Ross painting party last summer, with surprisingly good results for (most) everyone involved. For my part, my painting was chosen the favorite of two groups of disinterested observers who voted without knowing who had produced each painting. Anyway, it was decent enough that Mom (with Brad and Cass's help) framed it as a surprise for me, and we hung it up in the living room, next to the only painting Grandma Pina ever produced in her life.

Having succeeded so far beyond my expectations on my first try, I determined to follow the example of Harper Lee and go the one-hit-wonder route. But Cassie chose to have a second Bob Ross painting party as part of her twenty-first birthday celebration, and so, against my better instincts, I was pressed by paternal duty into taking up the brush and palette once again. And thus I trod the path into mediocrity, like Joseph Heller before me. But at least I know to follow the example of another of my artistic heroes, Johannes Brahms, and destroy my second effort, so it can't be trotted out to posthumously ruin my exalted artistic reputation.

One of our party wasn't too impressed with Bob Ross and went decidedly off script.

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*I'm not counting Go Set a Watchman, which was published not long before Harper Lee died and was really just an early (and much inferior) draft of To Kill a Mockingbird.

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Well, this is kind of embarrassing, though not so much as my second Bob Ross painting. In Episode 153, I swore that the fourth banana bread recipe I posted there would be my last. Since then, though, I (1) grew unhappy with the squat little loaf that recipe produced, (2) researched chemical leavening, and (3) read an article by baking whiz and CIA* grad Stella Parks listing "8 Easy Upgrades for Better Banana Bread," some of which I tried and really liked. Based on that article and Parks's own recipe for Classic Banana Bread, I made revisions to my so-called "Last Banana Bread," including: swapping out 1 of the eggs for ¼ cup of plain yogurt, which tenderizes the batter; adding cloves and nutmeg, which deepen the banana flavor of the bread through the magic of chemistry; adding vanilla for another flavor boost; and doubling the butter to increase flavor and fat. Despite all that, the base recipe and method remain the same, and it's still an all-spelt loaf (if you so choose), so I feel justified in calling this version 2.0, such that technically it remains my "Last Banana Bread."

 

[November 20, 2022: And I've now updated to version 2.1, which just changes the instructions to streamline the process and make the recipe in one bowl. No apologies.]

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*That's the Culinary Institute of America, not the Central Intelligence Agency.

The batter visible in the crack should look dry when the bread is baked through.

The Last Banana Bread 2.1

(one bowl version)

Adapted from Angela Hartnett via The Daily Mail and Stella Parks via Serious Eats

Time: ~1 hour (18 minutes active)

You can grind the nuts coarsely in a food processor (no more than 4 or 5 pulses), or with a mortar and pestle, or you can put them in a plastic bag and whack them a bit with the bottom of a heavy skillet or a meat pounder. You can swap out some or all of the spelt flour for all-purpose flour or other combinations of flour; one loaf I made with 100 grams of whole wheat flour + 50 grams of brown rice flour was spectacular.

227 grams peeled banana, from 2 medium, ripe (only just beginning to turn spotty brown) bananas (~340 grams/12 ounces unpeeled)
1 large egg (~57 grams in the shell)
1 teaspoon (4 grams) vanilla extract
75 grams (⅜ cup) brown sugar
50 grams (¼ cup) granulated white sugar
57 grams (¼ cup) plain yogurt, any amount of fat, but preferably Greek and nonfat
50 grams (scant ¼ cup) melted butter or coconut oil

½ teaspoon fine sea salt
½ teaspoon baking soda
⅛ teaspoon ground cloves
⅛ teaspoon freshly ground nutmeg

150 grams (1¼ cups) whole grain spelt flour (see note)

75 grams (¾ cup) coarsely ground (see bottom photo) toasted pecans or walnuts (see note)

    1. Place a rack in the center of the oven; heat to 350 degrees. Spray a one-pound (8½-by-4½-inch) loaf pan with nonstick spray.
    2. Using a potato masher or a fork, mash the bananas with the egg and vanilla in a large bowl.

    3. Gently whisk in the sugars, yogurt, and butter or oil until just blended; don’t liquefy the banana.

    4. Sprinkle the salt, baking soda, cloves, and nutmeg over the batter. Whisk gently but incorporate thoroughly.

    5. Scatter the flour and ground nuts over the batter. Using a silicone spatula, stir until just mixed.

    6. Scrape the batter into the prepared loaf pan. Bake until the bread is well-browned, feels springy and resilient when the center is gently pressed, and a skewer or thin-bladed knife (like a paring knife) inserted into the center comes out clean and batter-free, about 45 to 50 minutes (the internal temperature should register ~200 to 206°F when the bread is baked through).
    7. Transfer the pan to a wire rack. Let cool for 10 minutes, then turn the bread out onto the rack to cool completely. Store leftover bread, tightly wrapped in foil, for up to 3 days at room temperature or 1 week in the fridge. Makes one small-ish loaf.