Time to dye my hair, episode II

In a recent episode, I lamented all the "old guy" comments I've gotten in the past few years, not least from you guys, my beloved and adoring children. I toyed with the idea of actually dyeing my hair, having first broached the subject in jest more than three years ago. Since I hardly see anyone nowadays anyway, I figured it was now or never and asked Mom what she thought. Mom was so enthusiastic that she bought some platinum hair color the very next time she went to the grocery store and said she'd help whenever I was ready.

Well, today was the big day. While Brad and Cass were sleeping, Mom gave me lockdown haircut #3, then loaded me up with the hair dye. After rinsing it out, here's the end result:

Same face, unfortunately

Brad was the first one down for breakfast. He looked at me without batting an eye, nonchalantly said "nice haircut," and went about his business. Cassie's reaction couldn't have been more different. She was a little flabbergasted at first, then spent the rest of the day busting out laughing every time she looked at me. Which was pretty much the point of this—doing something a little crazy and totally out of character to break the drama and tension of going back to school, work, etc.

I was kinda going for the Billy Idol look, but Cassie said I look more like Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which I can certainly live with since he's one of the best characters on the #1 greatest TV show ever.

*********

Some things that make me cry

Recently, I sent Dylan a piece of creative nonfiction I wrote to get his opinion. He loved it, in part, he said, because I tend to express emotion more strongly in my writing, such as in my blog posts, than in person. I was a little surprised by that, given how easy it is to get me to cry as I've gotten older. But then I realized Dylan hasn't often been around when I'm doing one of the many things that starts the tap flowing for me, including:

1. Family gatherings where I have to say something about any of you;
2. Being injured and unable to run for an extended period;
3. Listening to the great German tenor Fritz Wunderlich sing "Ombra mai fu" from Xerxes by Handel;
4. Watching A.S. Roma beat Barcelona on a late goal in their 2018 Champions League quarterfinal tie, while Dylan and I were madly texting each other from across the country;
5. Watching the "you had me at 'hello'" scene from Jerry Maguire;
6. Watching the "I choose us" scene (among others) from The Family Man;
7. Watching the concluding scene from Crocodile Dundee;
8. Watching the concluding scene from "The Gift," Season 5, Episode 22 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer;
9. Listening to Grandpa Guy tell this story during our recent visit: After Grandma Pina died, my Zio Franco told Grandpa Guy that he had once asked Grandma Pina if she ever regretted leaving her close-knit family behind in Italy to marry Grandpa Guy and live with him in New York. Given how hard it always was on Grandma Pina to be 3,000 miles from her family, Grandpa Guy feared the worst. But Zio Franco said Grandma Pina immediately answered that she would do "everything the same" ("tutto lo stesso").

Okay, so being a sucker for sappy movies may not be tres manly, but I'd have to be a pretty cold-hearted s.o.b. not to well up at #9 on the list.

*********

The music of pain

Once in a while, one of you will catch me listening to some country music on the radio, when there's nothing else on. You make fun of me because, you say, the songs are all about a very limited number of subjects, mostly booze, pickup trucks, and broken hearts. Well, you can't fault country music for the latter, which is covered in plenty of classical, rock, pop, and every other type of song as well. It's just that country songs have a special way of putting things that gets right to the (broken) heart of the matter.

Recently, we were re-watching some episodes of the greatest of all TV shows, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. In "Prophecy Girl," the twelfth and last episode of Season 1, Buffy refuses Xander's invitation to accompany him to a school dance, because she doesn't think of him "that way." So Xander decides not to go the dance at all. Instead, "I'm just gonna go home, lie down, and listen to country music. The music of pain." Later in the show, we see Xander lying in bed listening to "I Fall to Pieces" by Patsy Cline. That is a classic scene, made that much better by the use of appropriately painful country music.

*********

Uncle Bob goes to Dr. Ho's

We had Uncle Bob in for a quick visit this weekend. Among other things, we had a nice hike in Biscuit Run (Uncle Bob was impressed with our nearly private walking spot in the woods about 200 yards from our front door), enjoyed Wonder Woman (a female superhero to rival Buffy), and then Brad and I took Uncle Bob on a pilgrimage to the mighty Dr. Ho's. As usual, we ordered an absurd amount of food and left feeling overstuffed. Thanks to Uncle Bob (not gluten-free, not vegetarian), I was finally able to try the legendary Bellissima pizza (a Margherita pizza topped with shaved country ham, shaved Parmesan, and arugula dressed with a lemon vinaigrette), which was everything it's cracked up to be. We also tried some seasonal Watermelon Agua Fresca, which was very refreshing on a hot day.

This afternoon, I tried to recreate the drink and I think I got pretty close after a few tries messing with the proportions. Most of the recipes I looked at only used a tablespoon of sugar or other sweetener (such as agave nectar), but I had to keep increasing the amount to get it to taste like Dr. Ho's, and Mom definitely approved of more sugar. You can experiment with the sugar to get it how you like it.

UPDATE (8/4/18): I switched to a new recipe using a no-cook simple syrup to sweeten the agua fresca.

Watermelon Agua Fresca

Adapted from Local Flavors (2002) by Deborah Madison, and Alice Medrich via Food52 (for the simple syrup)

You can serve this with a splash of tequila if you like.

No-cook simple syrup
⅓ cup (67 grams) granulated sugar
⅓ cup (80 grams) water

Agua fresca
3 pounds of watermelon, with the rind
2 large limes
1 tablespoon orange blossom water, optional (you can substitute orange juice or an orange liqueur such as triple sec or Cointreau)

    1. For the no-cook simple syrup: Stir the sugar and water together thoroughly. Wait 10 to 15 minutes, stirring from time to time, until the sugar is dissolved and the liquid is clear. Makes about ½ cup simple syrup.
    2. Meanwhile, remove the rind from the watermelon and discard any seeds. You should have about 1½ pounds of watermelon flesh. Chop the flesh into large chunks; puree the chunks in a blender. If all you have is a personal blender (like a NutriBullet), you can puree the watermelon in batches. Transfer the watermelon puree to a wide-mouth pitcher or container.
    3. Cut 4 thin slices of lime for garnish. Squeeze the juice from the rest of the limes into the watermelon puree. Stir in the simple syrup and the orange flower water, if using. Refrigerate until ready to serve. Serve in ice-filled glasses, garnishing each glass with a slice of lime. Makes about 1 quart, serving 4.

Buffy cooks!

In the previous episode, I was driving Cassie to some appointments around town. After the cherub's bassoon lesson, we went to a bassoon sectional near Hollymead Town Center. Since I didn't want to sit outside in the car and be mistaken for Cassie's grandmother again (no offense), I wandered around Target for an hour. I made my way over to the magazine stand where I saw the latest issue of Entertainment Weekly, which had an article (with lots of photos) about the 20th anniversary reunion of the cast of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Some of the cast members said they'd do another Buffy project in the future as long as Joss Whedon was involved. But Sarah Michelle Gellar said it was probably best just to leave things as they ended after Season 7, which I'm on board with given how bad the Buffy the Vampire Season 8 comic book series is.

And last week the Daily Progress picked up an Associated Press piece entitled "Sarah Michelle Gellar still has awesome skills with a skewer." It appears that SMG has written a cookbook, Stirring Up Fun with Food, the theme of which is how to present food in creative ways so that children will broaden their horizons: "Think of boring old meat loaf as a cute muffin." SMG developed these ideas with her two kids, including a four-year-old boy named Rocky, who, if he doesn't already, should be running around saying, "Yo, Adrian, it's me, Rocky." Buffy has turned into a domestic goddess!

100th episode extravaganza: 9 cookbooks

There may never have been a Very Special Episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but Joss Whedon still had "Once More, with Feeling," the greatest hour of TV ever. Since I don't have any musical ability (I passed it straight through to all of you 🎵), I can't write a musical episode of UaKS. So for my 100th episode extravaganza, I'll aim just a bit lower and pick nine cookbooks I've really enjoyed, for various reasons. The first one who leaves a comment correctly identifying why I chose nine and not ten or some other number gets a special treat (for real; contest open to U.S. residents only).

Here are the nine cookbooks, with my homemade binder of "Favorites" and the New York Public Library lions replica bookends Great-Grandma Sisi gave me a long time ago:

1. The Cook's Illustrated Cookbook (2011) by the Editors at America's Test Kitchen

If I'm having to rely on just one cookbook, this is it. They packed 2,000 recipes into this baby by replacing the introductory essays that accompanied each recipe in the "Best Recipe" series with a short paragraph on "why this recipe works" in this more than four-and-a-half pound behemoth. The trial-and-error discussion in the older books occasionally contained some interesting information, but it got repetitive, and the sheer number and variety of recipes (everything from appetizers to desserts and beverages) packed into this volume makes it the most useful Cook's Illustrated cookbook of all. And, of course, the recipes, though fussy, are unusually reliable. Also on the plus side is that the book was released in 2011, before Cook's Illustrated started recycling dishes they'd already covered, with seemingly more bizarre approaches each time. Picking one standout recipe from this smorgasbord of goodness is impossible, but our family will forever be grateful for the Potato Gnocchi that are high on everyone's list of favorite dishes.

2. The Zuni Cafe Cookbook (2002) by Judy Rodgers

This is the polar opposite of The Cook's Illustrated Cookbook—chatty recipes with a very individualized point of view, as opposed to the Cook's Illustrated recipes, which tend towards a more objective perspective due to the assimilation of feedback from tasting panels throughout the testing process. It takes 50 pages to get to the first recipe, including an introduction describing Rodgers' history and her journey towards the Zuni Cafe in San Francisco. Even better is the 20-page essay called "What to Think About Before You Start, & While You Are Cooking," which should be required reading for every home cook. The signature recipe, and the best way I know to make and enjoy chicken, is the Zuni Roast Chicken with Bread Salad (progenitor of the "Judy-Bird" dry-brined turkey). The Buttermilk Mashed Potatoes are also fabulous, as is the Pasta with Tuna and Pine Nuts.

3. The Art of Simple Food (2007) by Alice Waters

This is an even more fundamental book for beginning cooks. Part I encompasses more than 200 pages and covers "Lessons" such as "Getting Started" ("Ingredients and the Pantry" and "Equipment and Getting Organized"), and "Foundation Recipes" in a variety of categories such as salads, pasta, and desserts. Waters uses the foundation recipes to cover basic kitchen techniques. Part II contains a more traditional set of recipes employing the techniques conveyed in Part I. If The Cook's Illustrated Cookbook is the essential collection of recipes, The Art of Simple Food is the place to start building the knowledge used to make those recipes. The basic Cornbread (with some variations to change it up) is a good example of a simple recipe that works, and tastes, like it's supposed to.

4. Sacramental Magic in a Small-Town Cafe (1994) by Brother Peter Reinhart

This is something else entirely. The subtitle says it all: "Recipes and Stories from Brother Juniper's Cafe." The recipes are good, but the stories are even better. This is just a fun book to read from start to finish. If you make the recipes without reading the introductory stories, you're missing the point. The Spanish Lentil and Sausage Soup is delicious; the Coleslaw is a classic. 

5. Cooking for Mr. Latte (2003) by Amanda Hesser

This is another good example of one of my favorite types of "cookbooks." Like "Brother Juniper" and The Sweet Life in Paris by David Lebovitz, Cooking for Mr. Latte is more about the stories than the recipes at the end of each chapter. In this case, the book tells the story of Hesser's relationship with Tad Friend (a terrific staff writer for The New Yorker referred to in the book as "Mr. Latte"), from their first date all the way through to their wedding. The recipes here are a lot better than in most books of this sort, though, because Hesser knows her stuff. A former food editor of The New York Times Magazine (where the stories from Mr. Latte were first published as a "Food Diary"), Hesser is also the author of The Essential New York Times Cookbook and the co-founder and CEO of Food52, one of my favorite food websites. We have made two recipes from this book dozens of times each: Haricots Verts with Walnuts and Walnut Oil and Bavette Cacio e Pepe.

6. Pasta e Verdura (1996) by Jack Bishop

Bishop has been part of the Cook's Illustrated team since it was first launched in 1993, but the cookbooks he has written separately, including this one and The Complete Italian Vegetarian Cookbook, which is another winner, bear more of his personal stamp. Pasta e Verdura gathers 140 recipes for pasta dressed with various vegetable sauces, from A (artichokes) to Z (zucchini), with tips on how to select, store, and prepare each of the vegetables. One thing to remember in making the recipes: Bishop says in the pantry section at the beginning of the book that all the recipes were tested with coarse-grained kosher salt, so if you use a fine-grained table salt or sea salt instead, the dishes will be way too salty. We have a lot of pasta dishes in our rotation from this book, including Potato Pasta.

7. Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking (2004) by Marcella Hazan

There is plenty of pasta (over a hundred pages worth) in this one as well, but Hazan's book is a much more comprehensive treatment of Italian cooking, covering everything from appetizers through dessert, including a Walnut Cake that Amanda Hesser made for Mr. Latte. This is the book that contains "the most famous tomato sauce on the internet"—Hazan's Tomato Sauce with Onion and Butter—which is the "unsurpassed sauce" for our beloved Potato Gnocchi. I have to laugh every time I see the sauce discussed on the internet because there is always some philistine who leaves a comment saying it tastes like Chef Boyardee. 

8. Made in India (2015) by Meera Sodha

This is the most recent of the nine cookbooks to make the list. This is the cookbook that's so good I gave it to Uncle Clint for his birthday in late July, and he'd already decided by early September that I needed a copy for my birthday ... and now Dylan is getting one for Christmas, too. I have a long list of things I want to try, but the Chana Masala is fabulous (much better with dried chickpeas).

9. Flavor Flours (2014) by Alice Medrich

Alice Medrich does for gluten-free desserts what she's previously done for chocolate. Instead of using a gluten-free flour blend like most others who've approached the subject, Medrich concentrates on one grain or nut at a time (rice, oat, corn, buckwheat, teff, sorghum, etc.). The results are uniformly excellent, including a great version of her famous Queen of the Nile cake and some really good Almond and Brown Rice Brownies.

Update: Cassie wins the special treat.

My other self, episode II: tight, but not white

My stocking stuffer finally arrived yesterday. And it means someone has been reading my blog because it's a pair of PAUL FERRER underwear! They've got my name on the waistband no less than five times and once more on the tag.

How cool is that? They even came with a handwritten note from my other self: Paul Ferrer, Colombian underwear mogul. 

In the words of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "best present ever."